i feel that i don't treat my parents right these days. is it because i'm being a teenager, getting short tempered with them, irritated when they don't get what i mean the first time?
i feel very guilty afterwards. towards my parents. my dad with his puppy dog look, my mum with her sad look.
to say a simple sorry isn't easy. it doesn't help that i'm not the type to say so after the moment has passed. once it's gone, it's gone. to the people who know me very well, i am a very hard headed person. which is why sometimes i prefer to keep quiet, least i offend someone. okay lah, maybe i'm not such a thinker. i don't really have any offending remarks almost all the time, but i do sometimes have opinions which i just keep to myself. it's just too much effort to put yourself out there to get whacked at sometimes.
maybe there really is a problem with me. i don't know.
but i do know that i'm really sorry to my parents. i can't say to their face, they don't know this place exists, so i'll just say it in my heart, and hope that they do understand me.